Want
by watchitstark
Summary: Rachel found herself hopelessly crushing on one Cassandra July, and she also found that she had no idea what to do about it. Julyberry yay.


**Want**

Rachel found it hard to believe that she was lying in her makeshift bed on the floor of her fabulous new apartment with this problem in mind. Honestly, she found it hard to believe that she really had any kind of problem, she should just be thinking about Finn. Finn should have been on her mind all the time; she should be laying here thinking of him.

But she couldn't get _her_ out of her head.

It was driving her crazy, how she would look on at her from her place in the class, how she would gaze at her and try to pretend she hadn't. How she would recount the feeling of touching her, what the muscles rippling beneath her hands felt like, how she could almost feel the tingling in her palms. The look on the blonde's face as she had performed for her, how that had _felt_. It had been so empowering, to look at her sat there with her pimp cane and perform for her, to show how sexy she could be.

It was so strange, but she couldn't _wait_ for her next dance lesson.

**~Julyberry~**

"Schwimmer, point those toes!" Rachel tried to fight the smile at being noticed as she corrected herself. She was being told off and yet she was still enjoying it, she just enjoyed those eyes on her and having that voice speak to her and oh she had it bad. "Straighten your back, soften those arms! Come on! That was the worst I've seen from you today!" Rachel did another bad one, almost as though she wanted to see what Miss July would do.

"Oh, really? That almost looked purposeful," the blonde smirked, and then moved closer to her student. "Look, like this," she demonstrated the move that Rachel had been purposefully butchering. Rachel did it again. Badly.

"Now that time had to be purposeful," she moved behind her and grabbed her wrists so that she could guide the brunette through the move, wrapping her arms around her and pressing her body against her student's. The blonde's perfume surrounded her, her breath puffed lightly against her neck, her hands caused goosebumps. She could feel her body pressed all along her back, feel her muscles move as she guided her through. And she couldn't hide the way that she had gasped, or the obviously dazed expression she was unconsciously sporting. She only hoped that none of the other students were looking at her, because the last thing she needed was for them to all think she was some kind of masochistic weirdo.

"Class dismissed, Schwimmer get's to stay and practise with me, yay," she said sarcastically, still holding on to her. The class cleared out faster than Rachel thought possible, and then they were left alone. That seemed like quite a dangerous place to be. Her cheeks flushed as she thought about what kind of scenarios she'd like to happen. She took her through the move again, and this time Rachel honestly tried to concentrate, she really did, but it truly wasn't possible with that lithe body pressed against hers. She guided her twice more and then let go, moving back to give her space.

"Try again," she commanded, and Rachel did. This time was close to perfect, one of the best she had done, even though her cheeks were flushed and her skin was tingling and having this harsh woman's complete, undivided attention on her was enough to make her knees shake. The blonde moved away, giving her enough space to try again. Her student took a deep breath, trying to stop her knees from shaking and attempted it again, this time showing that she did have some kind of aptitude for dancing.

"Oh that was better, well done Schwimmer! You can go now," she walked away from her, dismissing the brunette with her body language as well as her words. Rachel grabbed her bag but she couldn't help the forlorn look that she unwittingly shot the blonde as she walked across the dance studio, watching her as she started to stretch in front of the mirror.

**~Julyberry~**

"Kurt, how did you realise that you liked guys?" she asked carefully one night as they shared a pizza and a bottle of red.

"Uhm, well I just found myself attracted to them. Plus I was the most flamboyant gay even when I was like seven," he chuckled, remembering. "What made you ask?"

"I just, oh it's nothing, don't worry," she looked down, hoping that Kurt wouldn't notice. Of course he did though; he is gay, after all.

"Rachel, don't give me that. Tell Auntie Kurt what's wrong?"

"I just," she sighed. "I don't know, it's probably nothing. She's not going to like me like that ever anyway."

"Have you finally realised your feelings for Quinn?" he couldn't resist asking.

"What? No, I never had feelings for Quinn," she shrugged. "I probably just idolise her, its nothing."

"Sure you didn't, you two had enough tension to burn up a room, I always felt like I was going to get pregnant just by looking at you," he smiled. "Who is she?"

"My dance teacher."

"The trainwreck that is Cassandra July? I thought she hated you?"

"Ugh she does. But she's just so… Alluring. I can't help myself, it's like an affliction. I crave her attention, even bad attention. This is even worse than when I had that pathetic crush on Mr Shue!"

"Where did this come from? And what about Finn?" Kurt couldn't help himself by pointing out the problem.

"I have no idea where it came from, and I love Finn, of course I do, but sometimes it just feels so brotherly that I wonder if he wasn't right to stop me from marrying him."

Kurt smiled. "I knew it, I knew it all along. Even though I was "wrong" about Quinn I always thought something wasn't right with you and Finn. You just, you don't have chemistry."

"I know," she sighed. "But that's not what's important in a relationship, I thought that because I loved him that that would come later but it didn't."

"Chemistry is important; it just isn't the most important thing," he sighed. "I don't know what to say, though I always knew that you were probably at least a little bit gay. Getting a crush on a beautiful trainwreck that teaches you probably isn't the best plan of action, though."

"I know, so I'm just going to have to ignore it. She's totally danced for me already, and I have a plan in mind that I need to get Brody to help me with."

"What are you going to do about Brody? Because he's not going to be pleased when you reveal that you're totally gay."

"I know, but that's something to leave until I need to face it. I'm pretty sure he's the kind of guy who'll make a move pretty soon, he seems rather sure of himself. And I'll just say I still love my boyfriend back home, rather than saying that I'm crushing really hard on my pretty crazy dance teacher. I mean, of all the people, Kurt? Fair enough if I'd fallen for Brody, he's cute, nice, can dance and sing, he understands. And I get a massive crush on someone that hates me instead?"

"Rachel, you don't choose who you fall for," he smiled gently. "Now eat your pizza and stop frowning, remember frown lines." She laughed and leaned over to hug him.

"Thank you."

"Always.


End file.
